Many, many years ago, I was diagnosed of that dreadful disease, the big
C- Cancer. I went under the knife and everything went well after that. But 2 years later, I had a relapse. The cancer came back and it was inflamed! I had to undergo radiation and chemotherapy. I was so
depressed. I felt like heaven and earth had closed on me. To have a
cancer is like having a death sentence. I cried and cried until there
were no more tears to shed. There was fear in my mind that I was going
to die soon like my mom who died of breast cancer. I knew very well that cancer
has no cure and the therapies I had did no good to me. They just
worsened what I felt because of the side effects. Chemo is worst than
the cancer itself. It made me very weak and thin and I can't eat and I
can't sleep. I can't sit down for straight 5 minutes and when I lie
down, I just can't breath. I really felt that I was going to die. My
hair fell out and my nails were blackish due to chemo. My immune system
was very weak that time. I asked forgiveness of my sins from my family
and especially from the Lord because I felt that I would not live any
longer. In case the Lord calls me home anytime, then I would be ready to
face Him. I knew I was heaven bound because I had accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.
During those times that I was battling the big C, I had many prayer
warriors. My church family was praying for me. During Sundays and also
during prayer meetings, I was the subject of their prayers for one
month. Some pastor friends had visited me and prayed for my healing. My
family and I prayed very hard because we believe in miracles. Day and
night I cried to the Lord for my healing. I believe in my heart that
with God there is nothing impossible. That was the time that I
exercised my faith in the sovereign power of God. During those nights
that I can't sleep, I went down on my knees for many hours, crying,
praying and pleading to God for my healing. I said to the Lord that I
know all people are going to die and if it's His will to call me home
then I'm ready but if it's His will that I will live then He will heal
me. With prayer, supplication and thanksgiving, I pleaded to the Lord to
extend my life. I made a covenant with Him. I had also claimed His
promises in the Bible like "Ask and it shall be given, seek and you
shall find" Mathew 7:7, "I am the Lord that healeth thee" Exodus 15:26, "Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them." Mar 11:24, "I will
never leave you nor forsake you" Hebrew 13:5. These verses, I said it back to Him
and the Lord honored His WORD. Slowly, I gained back my strength and my
health. Jesus has healed me! He is really the God of miracles! He
restored me physically. The good Lord had showed me that there is no
problem too big for God's intervention and there is no person too small
for God's attention. Satan wanted to defeat me and be angry with God and
to give up my faith in Jesus but He did not succeed. JESUS CHRIST is my
Healer.
Now I am a living testimony of how the good
Lord has worked in my life and He really answers the prayers of His
children. My prayer warriors and I were victorious. Cancer has a cure
and it's faith in Jesus Christ. He is the greatest physician. What
happened to me was a test of faith. When everything else failed, I
turned to Jesus. I unloaded all my burdens to Him. Man's knowledge is
limited, what is impossible to man is possible to God. I didn't get
angry with God, instead I considered my affliction as a blessing in
disguise because my faith in Jesus Christ became stronger. Maybe if my
faith in Him was weak and wavering, cancer would have knocked me down 6
feet under the ground. I believed that God had allowed this thing to
happen so I would be closer to Him more than ever and to depend on Him
and trust in Him when things become confusing.
The
trial in my life didn't end there. Satan tried to defeat me again in
another area of my life and that was my love life. My boyfriend of 4
years had joined a cult religion. He was brainwashed just by watching it
on TV everyday (Ang Dating Daan). Later he attended their church,
studied their doctrines and was baptized. He then wanted me to join him
there. I asked what are their doctrines and I got the shock of my life
when he told me about it. It was the first time that I heard of a
religion that don't believe in the doctrine of original or inherited sin
and they don't believe in the Holy Spirit either. They are not allowed
to eat during any occasion if the celebrant belongs to another religion.
Also their false teacher was very arrogant, cursed on TV, had twisted
the meaning of the verses in the Bible. His members were blind followers
and that included my boyfriend. I said to myself there's no way that I
will join that cult religion. My BF and I began having arguments
regarding our opposing beliefs. He said he's the man and I should follow
him. Our once smooth relationship became sour. We often had arguments regarding our opposing beliefs. I couldn't give up my
faith and religion for a cult religion, neither one of us wanted to give
up. I loved my BF but I can't accept his beliefs. I knew that was a
ploy of the enemy. I was on spiritual warfare. My BF said he was praying
for me so later on I would change my mind and join him in his cult
religion (he didn't believe it was a cult, he even said his religion is
the true religion founded by God an all other religions are not).
Before
this thing happened, we planned to get married on January 2000 but
he wanted me to marry him right away at that time but it will be in
their church and to be officiated by their false teacher. I prayed to
God for direction and guidance. Then the Lord told me that I should
give up my BF. It hurt me to do so. It was not easy for me because I
love him. Satan had reminded me of how my BF had stuck with me during those
trying moments in my life. He had accompanied me to the hospital during
my treatments of the big C. We've been through good times and
difficult times together and he said no sickness or problem could break
us apart. It never came to my mind that it would be our opposing beliefs
that would separate us. He was so kind, understanding, caring and
sincere. I thought I would never find another man like him. When I broke
up with, I felt like I died a thousand deaths. When I was alone in my
room that was the time that I released all the heartaches that I felt by
crying. I never forget his facial expression when I broke up with him.
He was very, very sad, hurt and he went home right away. My heart told
me to retract what I said but there was a small voice within me that
said I should not. It's the voice of the Holy Spirit.
With the help of
God and with lots of prayers I was able to recover from that break up
after a few months. A couple of years later, God gave me my life partner
that He wanted me to have for the rest of my life. He accepted me inspite of the illness I've been through. I won't trade him
for anything else. He loves me unconditionally and spoils me rotten. He is
a Texan and a Baptist preacher. He came to the Philippines in 2002 and we got married the first time He came here. We both flew to the US a year after. Now we're doing missionary works in the
Philippines. God is good and God is right all the time and I praise God for everything
that He has done and He's going to do in my life and in our ministry.
Being
a Christian doesn't guarantee that there will be no trials and
tribulations in life but the bottom line is how should we respond to
those trials. I have proven to myself that God will not give us trials
beyond our endurance. I obtained strength to overcome those trials by
acknowledging my weakness and relying on God. He gave me the strength to
endure circumstances beyond my human capability.
Brokenness
characterized my life, my health, my plans my heart and my mind. Yet
there is no despair. I bring my broken body, broken dreams and broken
heart to God. He is the source of wholeness in life. Whatever our
condition, He can touch our mind, heart and soul and heal our inner
being when we ask Him sincerely. By His power and His grace I now live
with peace that previously seemed unattainable, a joy that is hard to
understand and a hope that seems impossible. I am experiencing the best
of life in God especially with my hubby in my life now. This
relationship becomes meaningful because Jesus makes the difference. He
gives purpose to all my endeavors. Everything that happens to me He
transforms, making every situation an opportunity for growth.
With
God I have found that life even in the midst of problems, turmoil, pain
and loss can be satisfying and meaningful. Without Him, a life crowned
with success, power, wealth and health would remain lonely and empty- a
chasing after the wind.
